1. kill a girl named safety-constance with hair that falls in waves of ‘should’ and ‘shouldn’t,’ she works hard at spinning sugar and spice and she always says please and sorry for everything, begging to exist while apologizing for the fact that she does, and i can’t tell you about the hate, but it isn’t her fault, not really, and now i’m the one that’s sorry,
2. apologize for killing her, be sorry that she didn’t die, i’m sorry about the hair she loved, i know, i know, i love mine too, i’m sorry for the claw marks, i’m sorry that even now i can’t regret it, i promise apology often and always because i know she needs me to, because we’re stuck with each other, because it’s all we know to do,
3. tell her something secret: sometimes i still think in shoulds and shouldn’ts, sometimes i miss things being that simple, sometimes i’m still a girl, the girl, and sometimes i’m the beast of feminine grief,
4. know that to be a girl is to be blamed, to be something more wrecked than human, and i don’t know how to walk this tight rope, i used to but i think i must’ve fallen, and now there are sharp teeth where my knowing should be,
5. shiver at the definitions, be so yourself it feels wrong and when it does dye your hair or change your name, laugh with other monsters, and rewrite the goddamn fairytale, you’ve got to know by now that it doesn’t matter what you do anyway, because to be a girl is to be more flaw than flawed, so be something else
6. be anything else